Yes, today I am in a state of Zen. I feel calm. I feel light. I mean spirituality light because after dealing with the freaking gas pumps yesterday, at this sad excuse for a gas station I gain 2 pounds from eating the ice cream I needed to calm me down! Ok, ok ! Sorry about that…I’m back to my happy place now.
It is a good morning…It started with me finding the perfect outfit ,that fits, in the back of my closet to wear to my brother-in-laws wedding. I was so hating the thought of trying on outfits because I haven’t bought a dress in years! I told Rusty I was just going to the wedding naked and he said it was fine with him . Bahahaha! I am a jeans, hoodie and cap type of girl. Give me a pair of flip-flops any day and I’m happy! So yea! when I found the outfit and it fit, my day was made.
I also have the office to myself for most of the day! I have my spa music cranked up, the heat on high …..SON OF A BITCH! While sitting here blogging you guys, I was enjoying a bowl of fruit topped with yogurt and just flicked berries and goo all over me! Stupid plastic spoon! OMG! When did I spill coffee on me? Where did these stains come from?… Ok, breathe… breathe…Zen….Zen. It’s all good you klutz!………………………………………………………………………………………………………….. Ok the calm me is back after trying to wash the berry juice out of my shirt. It just turned into a camp shirt.
You know, most of the time I am usually a very calm and laid back person but as you have read in the past couple of blogs it does not always stay that way. Yesterday ,I was to that point again of calling Mark Twain’s Guest House and reserving a room just to get away from all the” me, me, me’s” in my life and get me a good breath of calmness. I cherish the moments I had sitting on the balcony with a glass of wine and a little background music, watching the mighty Mississippi flow by. I was a very peaceful weekend. I now understand why Mr. Twain wrote so much about it in his stories . I am afraid that my family and friends do not understand why I do the things I do now but I am letting the me I always wanted to be finally come out. She has been locked up since I hit puberty. I am releasing the creative me out in ways I never have before. Have always had a little fear of people finding me strange if I was myself but I like strange. I am not a teenager anymore so why should I care what my peers think. If they love me they will love me for who I am. If you are curious just ask. You don’t have to understand me…..just love and support me.